Welcome! Thanks for taking this important step in fighting the battle for purity!

Recovery Basics

As the issue of pornography and masturbation has grown, so has the understanding of the how porn impacts us, why we use it, and the resources available to combat it.

What would your life look like without porn and/or masturbation? Would you have more time for activities you actually enjoy and the relationships you want to strengthen? Would you feel more confident? Would you find it easier to trust others and have better friendships? Do you feel stuck in cycles of sobriety and relapse? If any of this resonates with you, there is hope!

There are many resources to help with recovery, and this is your guide to get started.

Through all of this PRAY. Pour out your heart to the God who loves you and desires your happiness. Pray with persistence for deliverance from this addiction.

You can do this! Your community will support you!

Things helpful to be successful:

1) You need to make the decision that you do not want to live with porn for yourself. Not because of what your wife said, or what Father So-and-So said. The motivation must be internal.

a. If you don’t think your life would be better without porn, maybe talk to someone who has been through recovery and find parallels in your own story – sometimes it is hard to see how deep the hole is when you’re stuck in it.

2) Block/filter/restrict access to it. See Matthew 5:27-30

a. Get a flip phone, install a filter, use accountability software, lock up your phone or PC at vulnerable/unaccountable times, etc.

3) Build connection – building a community of at least one person who you can be honest with is ESSENTIAL. Ideally this is not primarily/solely your spouse, but it should include her. Daily check-ins and building a habit of honesty will do amazing things for you.

4) Write up a 5-day plan.

a. Why are you doing this? What actions will you take when triggered, who will you call/text? What devices need to be cut out or at least locked up for a while? What is the consequence for relapse? What is the reward for success?

5) Set up a consequence for relapse and a reward for achieving a goal.

a. Don’t be too hard on yourself, especially at the beginning. i.e. take a cold shower

b. Start with a goal of 5 days. i.e. reward – get some ice cream.

Resources

Online recovery groups

SA (Sexaholics Anonymous) – www.sa.org
Matt Dobschuetz – REV Group coaching and recovery meetings – www.recoveredman.com
Blessed Sacrament Seattle - St. Augustine Group – Email for details: staugustine_group@bspwa.org

Books

The White Book, Sexaholics Anonymous

Porn Free, Matt Dobschuetz

Step into Action, Peter Kleponis

Unwanted, Jay Stringer

No More Mr Nice Guy, Robert Glover

Your Brain on Porn, Gary Wilson

The Porn Myth, Matt Fraad

Podcasts

Porn Free Radio – Matt Dobschuetz

The Good Men Project

The Mindful Habit